I don't know if this will even make sense to you or if I can explain it properly. The women were not real to me. I never had feelings for them. They were an object I was using to bring temporary pleasure. I did not and could not love them. To me, they were worth the least amount of effort to get what I wanted; and then I was done. They were a fantasy. They were not real. I only wanted them for selfish reasons. Never would I have had a relationship with any of them. I did not even find them attractive. Most were completely self absorbed and not at all women I would consider a relationship with.
You were my reality. You were worth it. You I love. You are my only. I will work for the rest of my life to undo the pain and show you that you are worth more to me than anything. I love you more than life.
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